Friday, September 12, 2008

Mission: Breathe Free

I have smoked off and on for about 11 years now. Mostly on until getting pregnant with Ethan. I gave it up cold turkey with no looking back or issues. Being able to do that felt great! Earlier this year I realized I replaced smoking with over eating and I gained 74 pounds during my pregnancy!

Some time in 2007 I started sneaking cigarettes when Josh was out of town or when I was out of the house alone. It was infrequent at first, then became more and more frequent. The guilt was eating me up and one night after phoning several of my siblings and Mom crying and confessing to them, I decided to be straight with Josh. Sure, he was upset but also understanding. By this time, I was pretty much a full time smoker. I tried quitting cold turkey a few times. After a few disappointments, I just gave up quitting.

Then, I found Chantix. I have used it twice now and it works wonderfully, as long as I was committed to staying quit which obviously, I wasn't. Josh was smoking as well and neither of us was on the same "quit schedule" as the other and that just made it sucky suck.

We are preparing to try for a second baby late this fall and we are both ready to quit (again) for good. So I've prepared a plan, of sorts, for myself.

Katie’s Breath of Fresh Air, No More Smoking FOR GOOD Plan

•Begin Chantix September 13, 2008
Cut back to 8 cigarettes per day

•Quit smoking September 20, 2008

•Refill script for Chantix October 10, 2008 for second month

•Finish taking Chantix November 13, 2008

•What if I want a cigarette?
Do some cleaning around the house.
Work on a craft project.
Blog about breathing free.
Play with Ethan and/or Jango.

•Why do I want to breathe free?
This is the first step in showing ME my self-worth. How important I am to ME.
No more coughing.
No more tight chest.
No more post nasal drip.
No more clogged ears.
Be able to work out harder.
So we can get pregnant.
I don’t want Ethan (or future child) to be hurt by the smoke.
I hate the stink on my hands, clothes, hair.
I hate the mess we have around the yard with all the butts.

I will also not replace this habit with another unhealthy one like eating. I've begun (slowly, sure) working out and that always makes me feel 100 times better in so many ways. So, that will be my new vice.

For those of you who know me well, you know I have self-esteem and self-confidence issues. I've begun to address and work on those. Quitting smoking and working out is a big part of that work.

So, that's what is new and "exciting" in the Barcklay world. Josh is going to quit as well I'm not sure on his details. Wish us luck! Anyone who smokes/has smoked, please let me know your inspirations for quitting and your tricks for distraction. Thanks for your support.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

We wish you and Josh all the will power to quit smoking and live a healthier life!

Jessica B.